Always, Bekah

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Not The Same

This week has been a MOOD.

And jokes on me, I'm writing this on Tuesday, so…there’s.. you know, the rest of the week…

This week has been one giant, eye-twitch on so many levels, so bear with me while I share some events from this week as well as my very scattered thoughts about holidays, life in general and a little bit of kindness.

Anyway, I'm in a mood, right?

It could have something to do with the fact that my tags have been expired since January (HAHA I’m a disaster) so I went to the DMV yesterday to get them renewed and the lady told me I wasn't Rebekah.

Um.

Excuse me?

I very firmly informed her that I was, in fact, Rebekah. My last name could be a little fuzzy, I can understand some confusion there, but based on EVERY SINGLE PIECE OF PAPERWORK I HAVE ON MY PERSON, I can confidently say that I. Am. Rebekah.

It took some convincing, but we got through it.

Half an hour after I left, I realized that there was a 90,000 mile discrepancy between what my brand-new registration card said, and my actual odometer. That same, darling, lady had missed an entire zero.

It’s fine. I’m fine.

Then I went to the grocery store, and one delightful gentleman took it upon himself to tell me that I was just "oblivious to the arrows" on the floor, and not five minutes later, I pass this very same man, going the WRONG WAY across the back of the grocery store.

I am not joking when I tell you that it took everything I had not to flip his entire cart over in the middle of Giant.

I can picture it now.

*Flips cart, groceries go flying everywhere

Me: “I. AM. REBEKAH!!!!!”

What a fun phone call my husband would have received.

Friends, this year has been UGLY. True, there have been many beautiful moments for each of us, but 2020 has not been kind. It hasn't been kind to us, and we haven't been kind to one another. And now we find ourselves in an ugly world, in desperate need of kindness and hope and love.

I'm hurting. You're hurting. We're all hurting in some way, shape or form.

We're hurting for our country, our kids, our families, and we're mourning the way things were a year ago. It's not going to be the same, maybe ever, and we're mourning that.

As I became increasingly aware of the fact that the holidays won't be the same this year, my mind went to Halloween.

I'll be honest, I HATE dressing up. It's not my jam, I don't like it, please don't make me. But, in the last few years we've owned our home, I've started to really love the holiday.

Story Time.

Growing up, we lived in the middle of nowhere, and since there were like, 3 kids on our street, nobody trick or treated. We had to drive 15 minutes to the nearest neighborhood, and that was where we trick or treated every year. I never had the experience of staying home and handing out candy until we moved into a neighborhood 3 years ago. That was when I learned something very important about myself.

I was born to hand out candy.

I really was. I get to stay home and have Hocus Pocus on my TV, and I get to see all the kids (our neighborhood has A LOT of kids, and they're all really sweet), and best of all, I don't have to dress up. Now that I'm the only one in my family who has kids around, I usually host everyone over for a cozy meal and to hand out candy. Because I love it so. stinking. much., I literally have a handing-out-candy party.

Look, I never said I was cool.

This year, I was really worried that we wouldn't get kids. I know my neighborhood kids are pretty hardcore, like they're outside playing almost every day, so I know they would want to, but a small piece of me knew that they might not come, and it made me sad. But I did the thing anyway, and I made a big pot of chili and had my family over, hoping that I would maybe get a few kids here and there. We set up outside, and put our candy in ziplock bags, and set it out on a table 6 feet away, and waited.

And do you know what happened?

Kids came.

Kids of all ages came trick or treating. They came in families, and they came with masks on. They weren't with a bunch of friends, they mostly came by households.

And there were a LOT of them. Probably three times the amount of kids we had last year.

It was the best Halloween we've ever had in our house.

November marks the beginning of the holiday season, and quite honestly, we all need it. We all need the cheer. We all need the random acts of kindness, and we all need the love.

Will it look the same as last year? No. But that’s okay.

Looking forward, I know Thanksgiving and Christmas won't be the same. There will be some missing faces. There might be some new ones. There might be a new way of doing things that we're not used to.

It doesn't matter.

What matters is that we make the effort. We reach out, we call, we tell people we love them and that they matter to us and that the world is better because they're in it. We use different outlets for random acts of kindness. We can have meals delivered. We can mail Christmas cards (one of my favorites!) and we can visit (outside, or masked, or whatever floats your boat). There are SO many ways we can nurture our relationships and reach out to those who are struggling or just need a friend. In this ugly world, there is a major shortage of kindness, and I would rather spend the remainder of 2020 showing random acts of kindness to as many people as I can, than sitting at home feeling sad that my holidays might not be the same.

Because they're not. It's not the same this year. Our holidays won't look the same. Our acts of kindness won't look the same. Our lives won't look the same.

Not the same, but maybe still okay.

Maybe it’s better. Maybe we're better.

Sure, it looks different, but kindness is kindness. And boy, does this world need it.

"And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love." 1 Corinthians 13:13

My goal this year is to continue spreading cheer all season long, and find new, creative ways to do it.

Here are just a few ideas I had to get started!

  1. Offer to run errands/pick up groceries for someone who can't.

  2. Send cards to those you haven't seen all year, and include a handwritten note.

  3. Invite friends or family to participate in an online Pollyanna.

  4. Send a message telling someone you're thankful for them and the relationship you have.

  5. Think of something you're thankful for, and find a way to give back.

    Example: If you're thankful for law enforcement, send your local station a pizza or drop off donuts and coffee with a note.

  6. Participate in a food pantry or Angel Tree program at your local church.

  7. Pay for someone's order at the drive-thru.

  8. Deliver baked goods to a neighbor (or all of them, if you love to bake!)

  9. Leave a basket of snacks and drinks for postal workers/deliverers.

  10. Have a Zoom call movie night with extended family and watch the same movie together (Bonus points if it's a Christmas movie + hot cocoa!)

  11. Call someone who is struggling, just to listen.

  12. Pick up extra canned goods to give away.

  13. Raking leaves or general yard work for someone who can't.

  14. Choose your favorite post on Hope for the Hot Mess and send it to someone who needs to smile (shameless plug, can't help it).

If you're with me on this mission to spread kindness for the rest of 2020, share it! Tag me on Instagram or Facebook, and let's spread some love and kindness together.