Everyday Cinderella

I don’t know who all has seen the story about the little boy who’s a University of Tennessee fan this week, but it hit me like a ton of bricks. Here’s a quick recap if you missed it.

A school in Florida was celebrating “College Colors Day” and one young boy in fourth grade wanted to represent his favorite school, the University of Tennessee. However, the boy couldn’t afford a UT shirt, so he made himself one as best he could. He had an orange T-shirt, and he drew his very own UT design on a piece of paper and attached it to the shirt (cue all my tears). He went to school wearing his homemade shirt and a group of girls at lunch made fun of him for it (aaaand this is where my heart was shattered into a million pieces).

The good news is the student’s teacher posted about this incident, and the University of Tennessee found out about it and sent the boy and his class a bunch of Tennessee swag, and that’s not even the best part! They created a brand new T-shirt with this boy’s design on it and sold it as a fundraiser to STOMP Out Bullying. WHAT. How cool is that?? I am now and forevermore a Tennessee fan.

This is a heartwarming story about turning around a sad situation, but being the emotionally charged person that I am, I’d like to unpack it a little more and insert my own opinion on this issue, because it happens way more often than we see in the news.

First off, this kid is a dreamer and I love him. He was brave and made something out of nothing, knowing full well he would stand out from everyone else. He did what made him happy and being a Tennessee fan made him happy (go back and read The Seasonal Shake-Up for a reminder on happiness). He is a braver kid than I’ll ever be. If I were in his shoes, I would rather just “forget” about College Colors Day, than stand out and support my favorite school. When I was growing up, we had everything we needed, and a lot of what we wanted, but we did not have unlimited funds. My parents worked super hard and budgeted and saved as much as they could to give us an incredible childhood. They prioritized traveling and experiences over clothes and toys, and I am so grateful for that. As a result, I wore a lot of hand-me-downs and got new clothes on special occasions (like Christmas and birthdays) and we got new school clothes in the fall. So I get not having the latest and greatest trends, and I know what it feels like to not have a spiffy new jersey for a special day at school. He knew his parents couldn’t afford to buy him a new shirt just for this one day at school, so he got creative and made the most of what he did have. This kid put his heart out there and I am so proud of him for that.

Let’s be honest, a spirit day at school is something fun to celebrate diversity, and nothing more. It is a day to share with others what your favorite school or team is and it costs nothing to have a favorite team. So I do NOT understand the impulse to make somebody else feel “less than”. Nobody should feel “less than” because their shirt doesn’t look like someone else’s. That is just ridiculous. I cannot even with that nonsense. There are so many days that children who have less worry about going without, and a spirit day should not be one of them. On a spirit day, everyone is the same. Everyone likes to celebrate something fun once in a while, and everyone should have the opportunity to do so.

I was honestly devastated for this boy for a couple hours when I read the story. That’s why I’m writing about it now. I was upset, and I wanted to fix it. But I can’t fix bullying by myself. I can’t buy everyone everything they don’t have, and even if I could, it wouldn’t fix kids being cruel. Having what everyone else has does not stop people from being mean to one another. So I thought about what I could do, and all I came up with was to be kind. Always. Kindness goes a long way, and its free. People who have a lot can be kind, and so can people who have nothing. We are called to be rich in love and kindness, and I think we all could do a better job of that.

Because I’m a major fan of Rachel Hollis (seriously, if you haven’t heard of her, stop reading this and Google her right now because she will CHANGE. YOUR. LIFE.) I do her Start Today Journal practice. Its basically a gratitude + goals journal and you can buy one from her website. I just do it in a regular journal. Anyway, my first “goal” is “I am kind every chance I get”. Obviously, I fail all the time, but it’s a solid reminder that I need to be kind before anything else.

In my quest to bring kindness into the world, I thought about how I could prevent even one person from feeling the way that boy did. It starts with children. Kind children grow to be kind adults. Whenever I do have kids, I pray that I can raise them to be kind and gracious individuals. As I thought about raising the kind of kids who sit with the new kid at school, I decided that I was going to be a little bit of an extra mom. (HA. I mean, have you met me? I am THE MOST extra. LOL.) Anyway. I am going to be the mom who texts my kids’ teachers like “Hey friend, I saw Sports Day is next week. Does anyone in your class need a sports T-shirt?” Because that’s something I CAN do. I can ask. I can provide a T-shirt for a kid. And let’s be honest, a sports T-shirt doesn’t cost nearly as much as the pain inflicted from bullying. It is a small thing that I can do that makes a big impact for one child.

If you haven’t seen the 2015 live action Cinderella, go see it. It is just delightful. It follows the basic story line that we all know and love, and adds this one little twist, which makes the whole story better. Cinderella’s mother is pure and good and before she dies, she tells little Ella to “always have courage and be kind.” Cinderella perseveres through her very tough life by clinging to those words, and it makes the message so much more powerful. Because, choosing kindness is really hard. It takes courage to be kind to your evil stepmother and stepsisters who make you feel “less than”. It takes courage to stand out and be kind to the person nobody likes. It takes courage to sit with the new kid at school. It takes courage to be patient with the coworker that complains nonstop and spews negativity everywhere they go. It takes courage to show kindness to your spouse when you don’t think they deserve it. It takes courage to be an example of kindness to your children every single day. It takes courage to be kind.

So instead of hearing these amazing stories on the news of one kid who got bullied and how an entire college came to his rescue, why don’t we do little things here and there to prevent the heartbreaking stories from ever reaching the news. There is enough tragedy in this world. Kids being unkind to one another should not make the news. For you moms out there, check on your kids’ classmates. Heck, check in with your kids. Find out if they have a friend who is struggling. We can check on our neighbors, our parents, our friends. Maybe someone just needs to vent over coffee. Maybe someone just needs an hour of childcare. Maybe someone needs a little help to send their kid on the field trip. With a little bit of courage and a little bit of kindness, we could be everyday Cinderellas and bring a little magic to our corner of the world.

“Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.” Ephesians 4:2

“Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as Christ God forgave you.” Ephesians 4:31-32