I love being a mom. I really do. It’s a whole gift and Will is easily one of the coolest humans I’ve ever met, but geez, it is not for the weak. Most days, I feel like I’m treading water, just doing the bare minimum for survival. I don’t think I’ve had fresh vegetables in my fridge for at least 3 days and I’m not going to the grocery store anytime in the foreseeable future (i.e., tomorrow. That’s all I can see.)

Let me tell you about today.

I’ve been super busy at work this week. The kind of busy where you have a to-do list and somehow you’re busy all day and have only crossed one thing off. I have a lot to do around the house, and also a small child.

The small child, who is usually very sweet and sleeps 10-12 hours a night, woke up four times last night. FOUR. He wasn’t even hungry, he just wanted someone to be there with him.

This same child also fussed and cried all day. He did not want to take a nap, and he didn’t want to play. He wanted to be held and snuggled during every meeting I had today.

This afternoon (after getting off work later than expected), he cried, we took a walk, I fed him his bedtime meal, and he promptly spent the following fifteen minutes grunting and pooping whilst, yes, getting snuggled on my lap.

I know it’s a phase, or a leap or a growth spurt where he’s extra clingy and needy and yes of course, I’m soaking up all the baby cuddles, and yet, the timing could not have been worse.

This evening as I was putting him back to sleep (in the middle of my dinner, of course), he reached out and grabbed my finger and hugged it close as he was drifting off (hopefully for the last time). My heart instantly melted at this beautiful, precious boy of mine and in that moment, all the frustration was gone.

I’m learning that as much as I love my little noodle, there are some parts of motherhood that I could definitely do without, and so today, I’m going to share some things that I love about being a mom, and some things I don’t. I’m all about keeping it real here.

what I love.

baby snugs.

I don’t care what anyone says, there are few things better than snuggling a sleepy baby. I could lay on the couch ALL DAY with Will. I love his little baby sighs and how warm he is and that he couldn’t be happier anywhere else than under a blanket with me. It is THE BEST and don’t anyone come in here and tell me all about how quickly it ends. Let me enjoy this.

toothless grins.

I’m almost sad for the day Will starts teething because I am obsessed with his gummy smile. He smiles so big and it is SO CUTE and please don’t grow teeth soon because, also, my boobs. Ouch.

watching him learn new things.

When Will first rolled over, I think he was as surprised as I was. He HATED tummy time with the burning passion of 1,000 suns. Every day it was a struggle to make it fun or at least medium enjoyable. Okay, let’s be honest, the goal was for it to not be straight misery. One day, I put him down, bracing for the screaming and he just picked his head up, looked at me, put it back down and rolled over. It is so exciting to see what new things he learns every day. He’s starting to laugh and giggle more, use his hands and chat about everything. I love it.

being “mom prepared”.

There’s being prepared, and then there’s “mom prepared”. I used to have like, hand sanitizer, wherever I went. Now I’ve got baby wipes, diapers, snacks, three outfits for Will, an outfit for me and an outfit for Elliot, just to go to church. It’s unreal, but also I feel unstoppable and prepared for a small natural disaster.

living with a baby, not for a baby.

It’s true, babies change everything. However, I try to be really intentional about continuing my life, not ceasing any and all activities I enjoy, just because I have a baby. Sure, it’s a little more difficult, but also, I like having Will around. I genuinely like the kid, and I like bringing him with me places. Elliot and I are both on our church worship team, and Will comes to practice every Thursday night. He goes to birthday parties (of all ages - this year he’s attended parties for a 3 year old and a 30 year old). Heck, we’ve even brought him to a bar for a happy hour. He’s a cool little dude.

what I could do without.

spit up.

A friend of mine told me that there’s a poop parent and a puke parent. I am very clearly the poop parent. I don’t mind a stinky poop, but I do not like spit up. There’s always more than you think and it spreads like the plague. I’ll think it was a little spit and 15 minutes later I find it in my hair, in my shorts, EVERYWHERE. 0/10 would recommend.

washing pump parts.

I don’t care how whiny it sounds, washing pump parts is the bane of my existence. There are so many pieces, they take forever to dry and I just hate it. It’s stupid and I can’t wait to not have to wash them 24/7. Pump parts are for the birds.

There you have it, folks. The wonderful, the fun, and the stinky. Motherhood.